Iowa's Largest Fryin' Pan

As I’ve said before, “World’s Largest” claims are sometimes dubious at best, but the large frying pan in Brandon, Iowa, only claims to be the largest in Iowa. The makers of the Brandon pan did have high aspirations, however, and it was originally designed to be the world’s largest frying pan. But the final pan turned out to be three inches smaller than the actual world’s largest frying pan at the time, located in Long Beach, Washington (which itself has since been usurped, and I’m unclear where the North Carolina contender ranks here).

Brandon’s slogan is “A Little Town We’re Proud to Call Home,” and you could just about fit the entire town inside of their large pan—according to the 2010 census the 0.32-square-mile town had a population of just 309 people. The post office is housed in what looks like a temporary construction site trailer, and despite being promised that the “Brandon Kwik Stop has a variety of “Fryin’ Pan” souvenirs for sale,” the clerk informed us that they were out of souvenirs, and had been for some time (the much-needed bathroom was also out of order).

The “Fryin’ Pan” was built in 2004 by locals to promote the annual Brandon Cowboy Breakfast, held the third Sunday in September. One thousand people a year have eaten the breakfast since 2000, which comprises “scrambled eggs, ham, sausage, pancakes, fried potatoes, sausage gravy and baking powder biscuits.” Proceeds from the breakfast initially helped to fund the construction of the Brandon Area Community Center and additional funds help with its maintenance. While the food is not actually cooked inside of the large pan—it’s purely for decoration—the 9’ 3” x 14’ 3” pan could theoretically hold 528 eggs, 352 half-pound pork chops, and 88 pounds of bacon.

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Iowa’s Largest Fryin’ Pan
800-850 Main Street,
Brandon, IA 52210

Strawberry Point

Strawberry Point, Iowa, is located about an hour west of Dubuque and an hour north of Cedar Rapids. It has a population of under 2,000, but it is home to the Franklin Hotel, listed on the National Register of Historic Places, the Wilder Museum, home to an heirloom collection of over 800 dolls dating from the 1700s, Iowa’s oldest state park and the world’s largest strawberry.

The town of Strawberry Point was founded in 1853 and named for the wild strawberries found in the area. The Franklin Hotel was built in 1902 and we had coffee in the hotel restaurant, which is unsurprisingly decorated with a strawberry motif—I love a town that really leans into a theme (like Roswell or Sleepy Hollow).

Strawberry Point is the very definition of a one-stoplight town and I love exploring small towns in the middle of America just as much as—and sometimes even more than—I like visiting more popular tourist destinations. The Wilder Museum was closed for the season, we were the only people in the hotel restaurant aside from our waitress, and the ‘bakery’ we saw advertised was just a table in the grocery store manned by a handless mannequin.

The 15-foot-tall, painted fiberglass sculpture was designed by a local ad agency, and it has been on display in front of the City Hall and police station since the 1960s. It’s incredibly detailed, much larger than I expected and appears to be well cared for (although it could use a little touch up at the bottom). This big roadside attraction is comparable to the world’s largest pistachio—neither are real examples of the food, which is an entirely different (and probably highly competitive) area of distinction.

‘World’s Largest’ designations are sometimes dubious at best—you might remember that I’ve already visited what claims to be the world’s largest strawberry, located in Ellerbe, North Carolina. While they do have the url worldslargeststrawberry.com, the Berry Patch farm stand could more accurately be called the world’s largest strawberry-shaped structure, while Strawberry Point’s version—unfortunately saddled with strawberrypt.com—could be more specifically described as the world’s largest sculptural strawberry.

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World’s Largest Strawberry
111 Commercial Street,
Strawberry Point, IA

Dickeyville Grotto

The Dickeyville Grotto and shrines were created from 1925-1930 by Father Matthias Wernerus, a pastor of the Holy Ghost Church and Parish. Located in Dickeyville, Wisconsin, about 15 minutes northwest of Dubuque, Iowa and the Mississippi River that divides the two states, the shrines were built from materials collected from all over the world, including stones, shells, colored glass, fossils, jewelry, pottery, dishes, precious metals and sea creatures.

The main shrine is home to the Grotto of the Blessed Virgin and there is a shrine dedicated to patriotism, a shrine of the Holy Eucharist, a Sacred Heart shrine, a Christ the King shrine and a Fatima shrine. The centerpiece of the main grotto is an Italian White Carrara Marble statue of the blessed virgin, sculpted in Europe. The interior is protected by transparent panels to deter theft and protect the artwork, but it also makes it nearly impossible to get a good photo (another argument for seeing these roadside gems in person).

The site is visited by more than 40,000 people every year, although we were the only visitors on a very cold Friday in December. There’s no admission fee but donations are appreciated. There is a gift shop (of course) that sells Bibles, rosaries, religious statues, medals, prayer books and CDs, but its hours vary seasonally and it wasn’t open when we visited. In addition to the obvious religious themes, the patriotic shrine also includes depictions of Christopher Columbus, George Washington, Abraham Lincoln and the Liberty Bell.

I’m not in any way religious, but I do love passion projects and these shrines are incredible works of art—even more so when you consider that they were essentially the work of a single man. Wernerus did have help, including benefactors and of course, his faith in God; volunteers pitched in to finish the last shrine after Wernerus died in 1931, and Stations of the Cross were added in 1963, but the artwork you see today is almost exactly as Wernerus intended.

The Dickeyville Grotto is the kind of religious expression that you’d expect to find in a desert setting (like Salvation Mountain or Desert Christ Park), where fanaticism and creativity seem to flourish—but the need to fill the hours of a life with a meaningful task is seemingly universal. According to Roadside America, “a grotto-building contagion struck the Midwest and south in the early 20th century,” a phenomenon they call “dementia concretia,” otherwise known as “the helter-skelter compulsion to cover whatever outdoor space you have with home-made art” (see also: the mosaic house of Brooklyn or Philadelphia’s Magic Gardens).

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Dickeyville Grotto
255-377 Great River Road,
Dickeyville, WI 53808
Gift shop hours vary seasonally, but you can see the Grotto even when the shop is closed.

Handless Jacques

When I visited Ohio after Christmas, I finally got to visit a famous resident of Marblehead, known as Handless Jacques. While he’s not an official Muffler Man, he is a big, strange, roadside statue which is enough to make him a destination by my road trip criteria.

Marblehead is a village on the Marblehead Peninsula in Northwest Ohio, with Lake Erie to the north and Sandusky Bay to the south. It’s a summer vacation destination, close to Kelleys Island, Put-in-Bay, the Cedar Point amusement park and is home to the oldest continuously-operating lighthouse in the Great Lakes region. Like other summer waterfront communities, Marblehead—population of less than a thousand—was quite desolate but beautiful in late December.

Handless Jacques was not always handless. In the late ‘60s, he stood outside of the Jacques Sandwich Shoppe in Marion Ohio and he held a tray topped with a large sandwich. When a fire damaged the shop, Jacques was moved to Marblehead and lost his tray and hands (cast as one piece) somewhere along the way.

Today, the fiberglass giant stands more than 20-feet-tall and advertises nothing but himself on the side State Route 163, between a gas station and a lot with a few rusty RVs. He’s much larger than a standard Muffler Man, more rough in his construction and sparse in decoration but he still adds whimsy to an otherwise unremarkable stretch of road.

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Handless Jacques
6020 E Harbor Road (State Route 163)
Marblehead, OH 43440

Muffler Man: Gemini Giant

When I started planning my recent Illinois/Iowa/Wisconsin trip, I realized that I would be able to travel a bit of the beginning of Route 66, which officially starts in downtown Chicago. My flight arrived at O’Hare at 8:30am and I was due in Dubuque by the evening, a 2hr and 40min drive if you drive from point A to point B without stopping—something I rarely do.

I decided that the furthest I could reasonably go southwest on Route 66, before heading back northwest, would be Wilmington IL, home of one of the most famous Muffler Men, the Gemini Giant. By the time I had reached the Giant it was 3pm and I was 3hrs and 30 min from Dubuque, but it was completely worth the detour.

In 1965, John Korelc, owner of the Launching Pad drive-in, paid $3,500 (more than $25k in today’s dollars) for the astronaut-themed Muffler Man. When Korelc retired he sold the Launching Pad, which eventually closed in 2010. The last owner refused to sell the Giant separately from the restaurant and in 2017, Tully Garrett and Holly Barker purchased both. They have reopened the Launching Pad as a souvenir shop and have plans to add food in the future.

The Launching Pad was supposed to be open when I arrived, but the doors were locked. When I reached out via Facebook they told me they had an unexpected emergency and had to close up for a bit. I’m sad I didn’t get to meet the Giant’s new owners or squish a penny, but I’ve come to accept these little disappointments as inevitabilities in life (along with the sun, which is seemingly always in the worst position for photos). Thankfully, they sell some of their Gemini Giant- and Route 66-branded merchandise online and I might not be able to resist buying one of these little guys.

The Gemini Giant stands 30 feet tall and—not counting his rocket and concrete base—weighs 438 pounds. After he arrived at the Launching Pad, a contest was held with local school children to name the giant. Inspired by Project Gemini, NASA's second human spaceflight program from 1961 to 1966, a fifth grade student proposed the name “Gemini Giant.” At least two other astronaut variants were made by International Fiberglass—one stood at Coney Island’s Astroland—but only the Gemini Giant survives today.

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Gemini Giant
810 E Baltimore Street
Wilmington, IL 60481
Store open daily, 9am-5pm, the statue is visible 24/7 in the parking lot outside.

Muffler Men: Crystal Lake

Although Muffler Men are much more plentiful than their female counterparts, the UniRoyal Gals, or other fiberglass giants such as Big Johns, they’re still pretty scattered around the country. I doubt I’ll ever see them all—not for lack of trying—but I feel as if I’ve hit the roadside jackpot when I can cross more than one off my list at once.

Crystal Lake, Illinois, a suburb about an hour northwest of Chicago, used to be home to three Muffler Men—two Bunyans and a Native American (only my second time seeing this variant). One of the Bunyans is not currently on display, but getting to meet two new Muffler Men at once was a treat. It was also my friend Francesca’s first time seeing a roadside giant in person, and it’s always a thrill to be able to see things from a fresh perspective.

You can’t be my friend and not at least acquire a cursory understanding of roadside attractions, but she was still surprised at how detailed they were—which proves that there really is no substitute for visiting places and seeing things in real life. Both Muffler Men are mysteriously missing their feet (and wearing the same mustard-colored pants), but they’re otherwise well-cared for. The Amish-style beard is a bit of a head-scratcher, but I love painted details like the hint of plaid, the crossed suspenders and the knuckle wrinkles.

Both of the big statues that currently reside at The Greenhouse of Crystal Lake originally stood at the Ozzi Waterpark in Palatine, Illinois. The waterpark closed in the early 2000s and the property was sold to build a new retail strip mall. I’m not sure how the giants came to reside at the Greenhouse, 30 minutes northwest of their original home, but I’m glad their philosophy appears to be, if one Muffler Man is good for business, two is even better.

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The Greenhouse of Crystal Lake
4317 S IL Route 31
Crystal Lake, Illinois
Even if the greenhouse itself is closed, you can still see these guys by pulling into the parking lot.

Muffler Man: Frankenstein

The first of four Muffler Man that I met on my recent Chicago/Iowa/Wisconsin road trip was this Frankenstein, located in Burbank, Illinois at the Haunted Trails Family Entertainment Center. Haunted Trails is about eight miles east of Historic Route 66, and about 30 minutes southwest of Chicago.

In hindsight, December is probably the worst month to take a road trip because most seasonal businesses are closed and there is very limited daylight. Although Haunted Trails is open year-round, the outdoor part of the park—where the Muffler Man is located—was closed when I arrived. Luckily, a very nice manager opened the gate for me and allowed me all the time I needed to take photos (unluckily, the sun was in the absolutely worst position for photos, but these are the risks you’re traveling with limited time).

This Frankenmufflerman’s origins are a bit of a mystery, but he allegedly came to the Haunted Trails sometime in the 1970s. International Fiberglass—makers of the traditional Muffler Men—went out of business in the early ‘70s, so American Giants theorizes that Creative Display, a fiberglass manufacturer located in Sparta, Wisconsin, used either a Muffler Man mold or parts of an actual Muffler Man to create this variant.

Although at first glance he appears similar to the standard Muffler Men, upon closer inspection you’ll notice some differences. The pants and hand positions are the most Muffler Man-like features, while the head, shoulders and axe all appear to be custom pieces. He has a wonderful, gruesome paint job and the iron bar stuck though his neck is a nice detail.

Haunted Trails is kind of like a creepy Chuck E. Cheese, and although I only took a brief survey of their offerings, I think it’s definitely the kind of place where I would have loved to have my birthday party when I was a kid—or, even now. I also loved the several screaming ghost trashcans that were scattered around and they prove my life philosophy that just because something is utilitarian, doesn’t mean it can’t also be whimsical.

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Haunted Trails Family Entertainment Center
7759 S. Harlem Avenue,
Burbank, IL 
Open year-round, but you’ll need special permissions to get up-close and personal with the Muffler Man in the off-season.

Bono's Historic Orange

Today is my friend Jim’s birthday (go say happy birthday to him!) and I’m missing him more than usual, so I’m coping by reliving a tiny portion of our Route 66 road trip from last year. When Jim moved to California, I was obviously bummed to be losing one of my best friends to the worst coast, but I was also excited to have a reason to visit (and a place to stay in) California. Arguably the mecca of quirky roadside attractions and novelty architecture, I’ve only been to CA twice, but my list of must-sees grows daily.

Bono's Historic Orange is one of six surviving orange-shaped buildings in California. It’s located in Fontana along a stretch of Historic Route 66, 45-minutes from The Donut Hole, and about 20-minutes fromt the Wigwam Motel. Bono's Italian Restaurant opened nearby in 1936 to supplement the revenue from the Bono family farm. The seven-foot-tall orange sits in front of the restaurant on the side of the road and thirsty travelers could buy a glass of orange juice for 10 cents.

The restaurant was added to the National Register of Historic Places in 2008. In 2013, owner Joe Bono (he’s a cousin of Sonny Bono) received permission to move the building 20 feet from the street and said he had plans to reopen the restaurant and the orange stand, but both remained closed when we visited last year. I’m sad that I didn’t get to purchase something orange from the orange-shaped stand (probably my favorite thing to do, ever), but I’m happy that it survives at all.

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Bono’s Historic Orange
15395 E Foothill Blvd
Fontana, CA

American Treasure Tour

Back in August, on the first day of our road trip, I parked in a large, mostly empty parking lot next to a former tire factory. My mom, who prefers not to know most of our road trip stops ahead of time, was confused. Even I was wondering if I had the right location, but just a few minutes later we found ourselves in the middle of one of the most eclectic, enormous collections I’ve ever seen. The American Treasure Tour, located in a 100,000 square foot facility in Oaks, Pennsylvania, is the work of one, anonymous collector.

The facility is open for tours Thursdays through Sunday, but we were the only ones there on a Friday afternoon. Visitors are allowed to wander through portions of the collection on their own, but the guided tram tour is where you see the majority of the mind-boggling amount of stuff.

It’s probably easier to say what isn’t in the collection (if there’s anything actually missing)—but on the tour you’ll see mannequins, wax figures, stuffed animals, miniatures, doll houses, pianos, classic cars, holiday decorations, dolls, radios, signs, wheelchairs, bicycles, movie posters, circus wagons, pipe organs and pretty much anything else you can possibly imagine.

The collection also includes an enormous shoe, the World’s Largest Slinky and the World’s Largest Popsicle Stick Castle, made from nearly 400,000 popsicle sticks. Perhaps the most whimsical thing about the tour is that so many things move or make sound—animated window display figures do flips and Wurlitzer organs play in harmony as you slowly make your way around the complex.

The American Treasure Tour is impressive not just for its scale, but for its organization and cleanliness—when the entire collection has been dusted, the process immediately starts over again at the beginning. I’m dying to know more about the owner, who has been collecting for more than 50 years with no end in sight—our tour guide said that new pieces appear frequently.

They say one man’s trash is another’s treasure and that’s true here to the extreme. I appreciate the equalizing nature of the collection, with no one thing appearing to hold more significance than another—priceless cars are parked right next to old Chuck E. Cheese figurines and cheap, creepy dolls are perched on one-of-a-kind antiques, proving that under the right circumstances, everything—even a lowly popsicle stick—can have value.

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American Treasure Tour
One American Treasure Way
Oaks, PA
Don’t miss the Happy Halfwit Muffler Man around the corner at Arnold’s Family Fun Center

Jim Gray's Petrified Wood Co.

After striking out at the Rainbow Rock Shop and before we toured the Petrified Forest National Park, we stopped at Jim Gray’s Petrified Wood Company. Jim Gray’s, started by Jim and Cathy Gray nearly 50 years ago, is located just south of downtown Holbrook, Arizona on US-180. It’s 1.5 miles from the Wigwam Motel, and about 30 miles from the National Park.

Jim Gray’s is still family operated and owned. They were originally known as the Holbrook Rock Shop, but have since become “the worldwide premier dealer of Arizona Rainbow Petrified Wood.” Wood from Jim Gray’s has found its way into the Smithsonian, the White House, and museums all over the world. We stopped at several rock shops and trading posts along old Route 66, but Jim Gray’s has the largest collection of petrified wood, by far.

Taking specimens out of the National Park is illegal, and the park is monitored on the ground and from the air to prevent theft. Luckily for the Gray’s, they insist that "there's more petrified wood outside the park than in it," and they own the mineral rights to several pieces of land nearby. They do their own digging, cutting and polishing, turning the raw fossilized wood into polished rounds, clocks, bowls, paperweights, tabletops, bookends and other souvenirs.

The shop is a bonafide tourist destination on its own, and it beckons visitors with painted billboards advertising its large selection of rocks, gems, minerals, fossils, souvenirs, Indian crafts, and rainbow petrified wood. It also has a squished penny machine, several large dinosaur statues and restrooms.

The most famous of its attractions is Wild Bill, a 2.9 million year old alligator. Wild Bill, bought by the Grays in Florida and named for a family friend, is exhibited for free alongside an extensive collection of polished wood and rock specimens from around the world.  

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Jim Gray’s Petrified Wood Company
147 US-180
Holbrook, AZ
Open 7 days a week, 8 am-6:30 pm

Gift Guide: Road Trip Lovers

I’m never happier than when I’m planning or taking a road trip. International travel has its advantages, but the US is so big and diverse that I love nothing more than hitting the road and seeing strange and unusual corners of the country. In my daily life, I love not having to drive or maneuver a car into tight spaces, but I love the freedom of driving on road trips. So grab an atlas and put on a ‘90s playlist while you browse this gift guide for road trip lovers.

1 / Sometimes I forget I own an instant film camera, but when I do remember to bring it on road trips I’m always grateful to have physical photographs to look through when I get back.

2 / Learn from my mistake and don’t wait until the last minute to buy your film. It’s reasonably priced on Amazon, but almost double the price if you buy it the day before you leave at Urban Outfitters.

3 / This has been my go-to camera case for years—it’s sturdy, padded and might get you some strange looks (something I’m very used to).

4 / I upgraded my camera body this year to a full-frame and I love it so much (perfect for getting those big roadside attractions in the frame).

5 / I sold off all my other lenses after I realized I was only using this 35 mm, and I’ve never regretted it.

6 / There’s a reason these backpacks are so popular—they’re lightweight, comfortable, durable and are surprisingly roomy. I have the black/red version (thanks, Jim!) but I saw someone with this striped version recently and wondered if I could possibly justify buying a second.

7 / Never underestimate the value of extra memory cards. I prefer the 32gb size because I find that I fill up 16gb cards too quickly. Luckily, these are available at most drug stores around the country if you forget to bring multiples.

8 / This isn’t the most sturdy tripod on the market, but it is incredibly light, compact and fits in a backpack. I actually broke the first one I owned when it fell out of the case (my fault), left it in an abandoned building and immediately bought a replacement.

1 / Most rental cars will have built in USB ports, but bring a car charger just incase (with two ports so your passenger can use it too).

2 / I have this book and tragically forgot to bring it with me on my most recent Route 66 road trip. I won’t be making that mistake on the next one, but it’s fun to flip through even when you’re not using it to navigate on the Mother Road.

3 / I bought the wired version of these noise-cancelling headphones for my Egypt trip, and I wouldn’t have survived my snoring Uncle without them. They’re great for plane rides, noisy hotel neighbors, or for zoning out in the passenger seat.

4 / I don’t need a huge wallet when I go on trips (I leave all of my store/club cards at home), so this card case is perfect for just the essentials.

5 / After what seemed like a lifelong search for a waterbottle that doesn’t leak, I’ve been happy with this Camelbak version. I can throw it in my backpack with my camera and not worry about a catastrophe.

6 / No commercials and the ability to download epic road trip playlists to your phone are reason enough to buy a monthly Spotify subscription (a 3-month subscription is only 99 cents a month until December 31st).

7 / The perfect road trip food.

1 / I bought this Route 66 towel from the Standin’ on the Corner shop in Winslow, AZ, but luckily it’s available online, along with a lot of other great road trip-themed designs (free shipping for Christmas orders).

2 / I’ve been collecting squished pennies since I was a kid, and while the machines are getting harder to find, I still come home from my road trips with a few new ones to add to my collection. I’ve filled several of these souvenir penny books over the years and I think I actually need a new one, if anyone is looking for a last-minute gift for me.

3 / A friend once brought this toilet spray on a road trip with us and ever since I’ve realized what a great (and considerate) idea it is to have this on hand when you’re sharing a tiny hotel bathroom with someone.

4 / Stamps might not seem like a sexy gift, but I’m notorious for not having stamps with me on trips when I’d like to send postcards. A roll of Forever stamps would be handy, but there are always several fun designs available like dragons, Disney Villains or The Art of Magic. Side note: when did stamps become 50 cents??

5 / I can’t stop singing the praises of these waterproof high tops from Keds. They feel like a sneaker but keep your feet dry without the bulkiness (or sweatiness) of traditional rain boots. Most of my road trip stops are outside, and these shoes are great to pack for all weather conditions.

6 / A bunch of my favorite roadside attraction photos are currently available as prints in my Society 6 shop, but if there’s ever a specific photo you’d like me to upload just let me know! Also, Society 6 is literally always having a sale so you can usually get things a bit cheaper than the list price if you’re patient.

7 / I have this album for my Instax prints and it’s great to have them stored safely and in one place. These albums are cheap, come in various colors and I love the bizarre phrase “Pieces of Moment” and random numbers on the front.

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The perfect gift for a road trip lover might just be to plan a road trip with them! I always have several road trip ideas floating around in my head at any one time and I’m always looking for people to actually just take them with me. The older I get, the more I value experiences over things, and my most cherished memories are of trips taken with good friends. So if you have a friend that loves the road as much as I do, gift them a few essentials and then promise to help them use their gifts and make some memories out on the open road.

Some of my favorite road trip destinations: South of the Border / Farnham Colossi / Cave City / Pioneertown / Roswell / Twin Arrows / Coon Dog Cemetery / Roadside America

RIP Magic Forest

I recently found out that the Magic Forest—my heaven on Earth, a fairytale/Christmas/safari park, mecca for fiberglass statues and home of the last diving horse attraction in the country—has closed.

I went to the Magic Forest, located in Lake George, New York, twice, but only once when it was actually open. On our visit in September of 2015, we spent the entire day walking the grounds, watching the shows and riding the five rides that were accessible to adults. The front desk employee actually tried to dissuade us from even entering the park when she saw that we didn’t have any children with us, but she relented once she realized that we actually knew what we were getting ourselves into.

The ladies at the snack bar were putting together a puzzle in between filling orders; I put a quarter in a prize machine in the arcade, and received no prize; we tried to play ski ball but the machines were too jammed with quarters to accept ours; the gift shop closed before the park did, but they let us come back the next day to pick up some souvenirs; the magician doubled as the emcee for the diving horse, and made balloon animals in between shows to give to the children—for $2 a piece.

In one of my many recap posts about our visit, I wrote that the Magic Forest was “a theme park that has remained untouched by time, become abandoned while it's still in business and is completely unaware of how cool and marketable it actually is—and I hope it continues to forget that it should have closed years ago and remains in Lake George forever.” But, of course, nothing lasts forever and the Magic Forest was recently sold to someone who plans to “take the park in a different direction.”

American Giants, champions of Muffler Men and other large fiberglass statues, are facilitating the sale of the Magic Forest’s impressive collection—a lot of the more famous pieces have already sold, but you can check out the online auction here. I don’t have the money or the storage space to purchase anything—for just $12,000 my dream of becoming the old lady who lives in a shoe could become a reality—but I do have photos of pretty much everything since I was obsessive about documenting our visit (this is just 81 of the 521 photos I took).

I also, like countless people who have visited the park since it opened in 1963, have the memories. Nothing stays the same forever, and this fact of life is equal parts comforting and terrifying. But no matter how much we may try to, we can’t actually stop things from changing. People die, businesses close, relationships end. But still, we dive again and again—like Lightning the diving horse—hoping somehow this time it will be different. Secretly knowing all along that when we cease to change, we cease to live.

The morning before we went to the Magic Forest, we ate breakfast at a diner nearby. David took a photo of me, sipping my coffee and I remember saying “I don't think I can be any happier than I am right now.” I was being dramatic, of course, and if I’m really keeping score I can think of several other moments where I felt just as happy—if not happier—than I did right then. But would I have been so happy if I didn’t feel as if we were about to cheat time by finally exploring the Magic Forest, a park that by all logic should have closed decades ago?

I’m not exactly sure how or why most of my interests are endangered in some way—diners and outdated roadside attractions and abandoned buildings on the verge of being destroyed completely—but perhaps it is their precarious nature that draws me to them. The urgent need to experience, to document, to be able to say I was there, I am here.

“Relaxing with the present moment, relaxing with hopelessness, relaxing with death, not resisting the fact that things end, that things pass, that things have no lasting substance, that everything is changing all the time—that is the basic message.” ― When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times

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Want more? See all of my Magic Forest posts here.

Holbrook

Picking a favorite town along any stretch of Route 66 would be like picking a favorite child, but Holbrook is definitely a strong contender. Not only is it home to one of the three remaining Wigwam Motels (and the last one I slept in), but it is full of fantastic signage, overcrowded souvenir shops and more kitsch per-square mile than any other place we stopped along the way from Flagstaff to Albuquerque.

According to the 2010 census, the population of Holbrook was just over 5,000 people. Originally inhabited by the Anasazi, Puebloans, Navajo and Apache, the town was founded in the 1880s, and named after the first chief engineer of the Atlantic and Pacific Railroad. In July of 1912, a 419-pound chondrite meteorite exploded over Holbrook, showering the area with 16,000 fragments. The largest piece, weighing 14.5 pounds, is currently housed at Arizona State University in Tempe.

Route 66 was officially designated in 1926 and the Mother Road passed right through Holbrook and the nearby Petrified Forest National Park. Holbrook isn’t quite as iconic as Tucumcari and it doesn’t have an up-and-coming arts district or a burgeoning restaurant scene, but it’s full of charm and more than its fair share of roadside dinosaurs.

After checking into the Wigwam, JMP and I headed out to explore the tiny town and we weren’t disappointed with what we found. We ate dinner at the Mesa Restaurant, serving authentic Italian cuisine alongside seafood, steaks, ribs and burgers (all of which are advertised on a excellent neon sign). We explored as much as we could before the sun went down, and ended the night with a DQ blizzard, which we ate under another excellent sign while sitting across from the Holbrook cemetery.

The next morning, while waiting for the Rainbow Rock Shop to open (which, it never did), we explored more of the town including several dinosaurs, abandoned motels and smaller rock shops. On the way out of town, I couldn’t not make a quick stop at Bucket of Blood Street, so named for a saloon that once stood nearby. In 1886, a gunfight erupted in the bar, resulting in so much carnage that “the floors were said to be slick with a ‘bucket of blood.’”

Rainbow Rock Shop

After checking out of the Wigwam, we stayed in Holbrook, Arizona specifically until 10 am to visit the Rainbow Rock Shop. Holbrook, a once-thriving stop along Route 66, has to have the largest dinosaur-to-people ratio of any town we stopped at on our trip along the Mother Road. The statues—made of various materials and styles—are scattered around town and each has its own unique story about how it ended up in Holbrook.

Holbrook is in an area of Arizona that is filled with fossils from the Triassic Period. Petrified Forest National Park, 25 miles northeast of Holbrook, contains the fossilized remains of terrestrial vegetation as well as the remains of dinosaur predecessors Phytosaurs and Allokotosaurs.

Located about a half mile east of the Wigwam Motel, the Rainbow Rock Shop is home to seven of Holbrook’s dinosaur statues. These concrete dinos were custom built by the owner over the course of twenty years, and they charge patrons to take photos with the prehistoric giants. I love their simple, cartoonish faces and they’re impossible to miss if you’re driving into, or out of, town.

I should say that I’ve only read that the owners charge for photo ops, because we didn’t actually go inside of the Rainbow Rock Shop. We arrived promptly at 10 am to find the shop closed. I, meticulous road trip planner, somehow missed that they were closed on Sundays. Luckily, you can see the dinosaurs from the sidewalk and most of the shop by peeking through the chainlink fence.

Rainbow Rock Shop is a souvenir shop that sells rocks, of course—Geodes each!—including petrified wood and other specialty rocks. I love the hand-painted signage, murals and low-tech, vintage vibe of the property. There is no shortage of options in the area to satisfy all of your specialty rock needs, but if you like to shop for your prehistoric souvenirs surrounded by roadside kitsch, the Rainbow Rock Shop is your place.

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Rainbow Rock Shop
101 Navajo Blvd
Holbrook, AZ
Open 10 am - 4:15 pm (lol) every day but Sunday

Winslow, Arizona

Winslow, Arizona is a town along old Route 66, east of Flagstaff, Twin Arrows, Two Guns and the Meteor City Trading Post. It’s about 20 minutes west of the Jack Rabbit Trading Post, 30 minutes west of Holbrook and 60 miles from the Petrified Forest National Park. Winslow wasn’t on my radar before our Route 66 trip back in June, but we had time before we had to check into the Wigwam Motel so we decided to stop.

My co-pilot and frequent road trip collaborator, Jean-Marie, reminded me that I most certainly had heard of Winslow, Arizona—and you probably have too. The 1972 song Take It Easy, penned by Jackson Browne and Glenn Frey, was the first single released by The Eagles. The song peaked at No. 12 on the July 22, 1972 Billboard Hot 100 chart and contained the lyrics, “Well, I'm a standing on a corner in Winslow, Arizona and such a fine sight to see. It's a girl, my Lord, in a flatbed Ford slowin' down to take a look at me." The song was the opening track on the band's debut album; it has been included on all of their live and compilation albums and coincidentally (or not) it was playing outside of the souvenir shop when we stopped.

Apart from its tenuous connection to fame, there isn’t much to see in Winslow (apart from the Falcon The Family Restaurant’s wonderful signage). But you have to hand it to a city with a population of less than 10,000 for turning its proverbial fifteen minutes into a bonafide roadside attraction.

Once a thriving Route 66 destination, the town declined rapidly after it was bypassed by I-40 in the late ‘70s. The Standin' On the Corner Foundation was formed to build tourism and in 1999—funded by donors whose names are inscribed in bricks on the ground—Standin’ On the Corner Park opened.

The small park features a two-story trompe l'oeil mural by John Pugh on the surviving brick face of a building that burned down in 2004. Two bronze statues stand in front of the wall, one of a life-sized man who is standing on the corner with a guitar by his side, and one of Glenn Frey, who died in 2016. A red flatbed Ford—slowin' down to take a look at me—is parked nearby.

Across the street is a souvenir shop—also called Standin’ On the Corner—where you can squish a penny and buy Route 66 souvenirs or (disturbingly) pro-Trump bumper stickers and hats. Diagonal to the souvenir shop is a coffee shop and we sat outside sipping iced coffees and watched in amusement as families steadily piled out of their cars to take photos of themselves—you guessed it—standin’ on the corner (such a fine sight to see).

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Standin’ On the Corner Park
Corner of Kinsley and E 2nd Street
Winslow, AZ

Civil War Tails

Civil War Tails at the Historic Homestead is an attraction in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania. Located in the National Soldiers’ Orphans’ Homestead—used as an orphanage for soldiers’ children after the war—Civil War Tails is a museum featuring dioramas populated with hand-made miniature soldiers, trees, horses, cannon and ships. The “tails” part of the name is not a mistake—the miniature soldiers are actually cats, individually sculpted out of clay and painted to resemble Union or Confederate soldiers.

I shouldn’t have to explain why I wanted to visit a museum with dioramas filled with miniature cats, but unique, passion projects like Civil War Tails are my very favorite thing to see on road trips. The museum was started by identical twin sisters, Rebecca and Ruth. They both shared a love of cats, and an interest in the Civil War was sparked when they were young and read the biographies of Civil War generals Robert E. Lee and Ulysses S. Grant. Cats were easier to sculpt than humans, and thus Civil War Tails was born.

Every diorama is made on a one-to-one ratio with to-scale figures—each cat represents one soldier. The detail is incredible, and they continue to create new dioramas and improve upon their techniques. Current scenes include Fort Sumter, Pickett’s Charge, Little Round Top, Andersonville Prison and even photography pioneer Matthew Brady setting up his camera on the battlefield.

We were the only visitors the the Homestead, so we got a private tour led by one of the twins. She was clearly passionate about each scene and described them in great detail. There is a exhibit showing the evolution of the sisters’ craft, and you can take home a tiny clay cat souvenir if you wish. My favorite part about Civil War Tails was the ticket itself—an optimistic punch card that awards visitors with free admission on their tenth visit.

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Civil War Tails
785 Baltimore Street
Gettysburg, PA
Hours vary by season-check here before you go

John Brown Wax Museum

John Brown was an American abolitionist who believed that armed rebellion was the best way to overturn slavery. He advocated for action over talk, and in 1856, Brown and his supporters killed five pro-slavery settlers in the Pottawatomie massacre in Kansas. He’s best known for leading a raid on the federal armory at Harpers Ferry, Virginia (now West Virginia), where seven people were killed and ten were injured when Brown tried to arm slaves with stolen weapons. He was captured and tried for treason against the Commonwealth, murder and inciting a slave rebellion—he was found guilty on all counts and hanged.

The raid at Harpers Ferry may have helped fuel the fire for the South's secession from the Union a year later and the Civil War that followed. Brown’s position in history is still controversial, with some people seeing him as a hero while others label him a terrorist. Another distinction that Brown has is that he’s one of only two historical figures to have a wax museum exclusively devoted to his story (Jesus is the other one).

The John Brown Wax Museum opened in Harpers Ferry in 1963. The museum is located in a building that actually existed in 1859 during Brown’s raid, and the block on which it stands became a protected National Historical Park shortly after the museum opened. Harpers Ferry is a cute little historical town, with some restaurants, shops and a train station.

I adore old wax museums, and I just had to see one entirely devoted to a somewhat obscure historical figure. We were driving from Gettysburg, and I was afraid that we weren’t going to make it to Harpers Ferry before the museum closed at 5pm. We pulled up the museum at 5:01 and I nearly pushed my mom out of the car in front of the museum so I could find parking.

After circling the tiny town for what seemed like forever, I finally found a spot and literally ran to the museum. When I burst in the front door, the woman at the front desk had already graciously decided to stay open long enough for us to see the ten or so dioramas. “You’re my last customers of the day,” she said—although from the looks of things we may have been the only customers of the day.

The 87 life-size figures are wonderful in their detail, and the entire museum feels like a time capsule from the ‘60s. There are handpainted signs, creaky steps, crude animatronics, cobwebs and a lot of dust, much like you’ll find at the Salem Wax Museum, the House of Frankenstein in Lake George or Niagara’s Wax Museum of History. It’s a little bit educational, a little bit creepy, and exactly the kind of thing worth speeding to get to while it’s still—somewhat improbably—open for business.

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John Brown Wax Museum
168 High Street,
Harpers Ferry, WV 25425
Parking at the train station behind the museum

El Rancho

The El Rancho hotel and motel in Gallup, New Mexico, opened in 1936. It was built by film director D. W. Griffith as a base for numerous movie productions. As a result, the hotel has hosted hundreds of movie stars over the years, including Errol Flynn, Gregory Peck, Humphrey Bogart, Jane Fonda, Jimmy Stewart, Joan Crawford, Katherine Hepburn, Kirk Douglas (still alive!), John Wayne, Lucille Ball, Mae West, Rita Hayworth and Ronald Reagan. As you drive along Route 66, there are billboards for miles advertising the El Rancho’s “celebrity” credentials, although most of the people used in the advertising campaign haven’t stayed at the El Rancho (or any other hotel) for quite some time.

This was the first trip that I’ve taken where every hotel that we stayed in was just as much of an attraction as our other stops. Route 66 has no shortage of roadside motels but the El Rancho—older than a lot of the other surviving hotels—feels special. There isn’t much to see in Gallup (be sure to say hi to Dude Man), but it’s a great place to stop for the night in between Holbrook and Albuquerque.

The rooms are all named for its famous past residents, and they’re spacious and clean. If you don’t want to stay over I recommend at the very least stopping in to see the beautiful lobby or to have a drink in the 49er Lounge, named one of the Top 50 bars in the US by Esquire magazine. We had dinner and breakfast in the hotel restaurant and both meals were fantastic—green chile enchiladas (when in New Mexico…) and the crispiest pancakes I’ve ever had.

The El Rancho has a lot of competition among all of the classic neon signage to be found in Gallup and along Route 66, but the El Rancho holds its own with a blinking sign that reads both “motel” and “hotel.” Their slogan is “the charm of yesterday with the convenience of tomorrow,” and while I’m not so sure the latter is still true, the El Rancho more than makes up for it in the charm department.

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El Rancho
1000 E. Highway 66
Gallup, NM 87301